A Holiday Resolution

Every year I make the same promise (to myself).  I will not become consumed with the commercialism of the holiday season.  Yet here I am again, November  – I didn’t even carve this year’s pumpkin – and I’m already making lists and budgets for holiday shopping, anxiously perusing store shelves for the latest and greatest Christmas décor that money can buy.  My calendar already runneth over with parties and shindigs that really just translate to more host/hostess presents and party outfits to purchase.
 
I continually do this to myself year after year, all the while knowing that the mad dashes through malls and taxing workout to my credit are not at all satisfying; not to my wallet, not to my loved ones and least of all to my spirit. Deep down, in theory, I do understand what the events that constitute “the holidays” are supposed to be about, but it all gets a bit more garbled in practice the older I get.
 
So this year I’m making a pledge to reclaim my holiday magic – the warm-fuzzies that once filled me with joy at the thought of three hours of quality time in the kitchen with Mom and Grams while the turkey cooks, pumpkin pie bakes, presents glisten under the tree and Pernil y arroz con gandules (traditional Puerto Rican holiday meal) awaits. Now the same list leaves me only anxious at all the preparations and work it takes and the spare time and cash I seem to always be short on.
 
My grand plan involves shifting my focus from egocentrism to altruism by starting some traditions of my very own:
 
Giving more of myself.  This is the time of year when we seem to become a bit more generous to charitable causes, but usually only by writing/ mailing a check we don’t think about again until it’s time to claim it as a write-off.
 
Don’t get me wrong, I’ll write the check this year too, but I also plan to spend some time appreciating all that I have to be thankful for by volunteering my time and efforts to do good for others in true need (i.e. soup kitchen, shelter, church pantry), not the petty gripes we’re all guilty of complaining about on a regular basis. I figure that if Rachael Ray has time to host a free Thanksgiving dinner for the entire Ohio city of Wilmington to help out an entire town without jobs, then I can find a bit of time to give to Meals on Wheels or a similar organization.
 
Focus on family – Immediate family usually gets the brunt of my selfish streaks, and at no other time of year is this truer than the holidays when the short trips home are jammed packed with last minute shopping, visiting childhood friends and their families, holiday preparations, and obligations of all kinds, most of which involve family. This year I promise to sit through and appreciate grandpa’s stories, even if I can already narrate them from memory.  I will willingly and smilingly trek with my mother to whatever relative she wants to visit; and I’ll even attempt to be nicer to my sister. This is the least I can do for the people that continually provide unconditional love and are the root of most of the things I’m grateful for in this world.
 
Finally, I will be more considerate of others’ needs and wants in an effort to share with them a bit of the same holiday magic I’d love to recapture.
 
After all, aren’t love, family, compassion and giving back what the holidays are supposed to be about?

By Brenda Becker